Excerpts from a writer's diary

You are the one thing I can't get rid of, from my mind. You're like the nightmare which keeps haunting. Your thoughts send a shiver down my spine, still. It's an ocean and I drown in them everytime, trying to stay afloat. Your voice still echoes faintly in my head. Was it yours or was it mine, the mistake, my love? 

I'm not here to write for you a fairytale, a story where you nevertheless have a happy ending. No, I'm not here for that. I'm here for the chilling reality. Things which are bitter. I'm giving you meaning to words like failure, struggle and betrayal. You will face them and let me give you a glimpse of it, to make you get accustomed to it. Let me be different, atleast. You might not like it. But, everything which happens in your journey doesn't happen the way you like. That's life. And you accept it.

There's something which is telling me to forgive them. Forgive them for their shortcomings, for their mistakes. Isn't life about forgiving and forgetting? But, they were wrong. They let go of you. They let go of you, just like the wind let goes of the land and as the leaves let go of their branches. Without even a goodbye to hit back reality onto this innocent soul which awaits their presence, still. It was only wrong on our side for us to wait for their presence in our midst while they mindlessly carried on their journey. We are letting go. For a new dawn awaits us. For our heart wants to find peace, rather still yearn for the love which is lost.

I need to write my heart out. I need to make my thoughts flow on paper. I find peace when I put my thoughts down on paper, it feels light after that. Maybe, this is what I'm meant to do. Write, write and write. And I'm gonna do that. Write everything which runs in my mind for me to find solace. I can be a writer, perhaps. It's fun, you know. Maybe I was meant to do this. I'm not sure still. It's difficult to put your thoughts down on paper. I'm gonna strive though. Strive to get it right.  Hit the bullseye with this. Maybe, this will set me on the right path. A path to something great. Something big. The start might be difficult, the end will sure be beautiful. I might not even publish anything I write, but I'm gonna write though. It keeps me happy. I feel something in me which makes me wanting to do it. I might not be even at par, but does that even matter? An amateur blogger's first post!  :)